Schlegel, Anthony

Schlegasaurus Slowpocus (commonly known as Anthony Schlegel) was a linebacker for the New York Jets. He was found perfectly preserved in the Dallas Tar Pits. He was drafted in the third round of the 2006 NFL Draft.

Schlegasaurus is known for his pea brain, most notably on his special teams plays, and in speed is a match for his antecedents, Slomolewisaurus Rex and Marvinjones Tardicus.

College career

Schlegasaurus played college football at Ohio State University after transferring from the United States Air Force Academy. He spent most of his time eating grass, and proved quite efficient at this.

NFL Career

Schlegasaurus was selected in the third round of the 2006 NFL Draft, with the 76th pick by the Jets. He managed a grand total of one tackle in the 2006 season. Rumours persist he may be traded to the Museum of Natural History for a stuffed caveman.

Extinction

Schlegasaurus Slowpocus was declared extinct in 2007 and cut. His skeleton may be seen in Hofstra, where visitors can take photos. However, scientists in Cincinnati have decided to recreate him from DNA they have found.