by Scott Dierking

I am cheating on my wife. My mistress is usually not a lot to behold but has, at times, been characterized as a Cinderella-type. She is a constant tease, but I keep coming back for more. She has been abusive, exhilarating, lazy, the belle of the ball, unorganized, nurturing, among many other things. Sometimes she has been all of those things at once.

My wife is perfectly aware of this mistress, and has even been an enabler. She sees that this tramp can never give me the real emotional support that I truly need, so she does not pose a threat. I think my wife enjoys the diversion that this potential home-wrecker creates.

My girl-toy works only part time and dresses in green and white. When she does work, sometimes I see that her heart is not even in it. She realizes that even for her sometimes ragamuffin appearance, she has many other suitors as well. This fact seems to make her seemingly uncaring in the direction that our relationship takes.

I have known this girl since 1973. At the relative tender age of 10, and growing up in the wilds of the Poconos, I was surprised to find myself with the option of a few girls throwing themselves at my feet, vying for my attention. See, as the Poconos are located, a young boy will find himself concentrically located to the availability of several girls of similar backgrounds.

Namath, bootlegs to the left and limps into the endzone, untouched!

The girl that wore black and gold was to our west. She was starting to gain popularity at this time and really seemed to have something going for her. She came from a good family and even a young kid could see that she was destined for stardom.

But, that steel town girl, there was something about her that screamed tramp all over. Everyone seemed to like her. I knew it as soon as I walked on the bus, the first day after Christmas break every school year. Climbing the steps of the bus, I would suddenly be swallowed into a sea of black and gold reflecting off the shiny new jackets and tassel caps that had been unwrapped the prior week. This girl had too many callers for my personal taste.

Namath hits a wide-open Rich Caster, galloping in stride, and he is taken down at the two!

There was another girl, way down south from the City of Brotherly Love. She liked to dress in green and white, too. She was a little bit older, so I was leery of her from the get-go. The kids that liked her, I always thought that their parents set them up in that relationship. Something just did not seem right about that.

Leahy pulls the field goal left and they lose! Leahy is kneeling at the 35 in a heap of dejection!

My girl has a sister, and I think that I had a chance with her, too. She was older, dresses in all blue, had been around the block a few times, and had a lunch pail work ethic. If you put these sisters side by side during this period of the early 70’s, it was difficult to tell them apart from their demeanor.

But, if you looked closer, my girl seemed to have that something extra. Call it panache or a subtle cockiness, she just seemed to carry herself a little bit differently than some of the other girls. For me, it was love at first sight.

Klecko beats a double team on the edge and takes down the quarterback!

I should have known right away that this was an abusive relationship. I always seemed to be giving, especially emotionally, and I never seemed to get that back in return. It was as if I was some glutton for punishment. I was approaching my college years and I figured a tour of Penn State would help me get over this crush that was suffocating me.

Funny thing is, it didn’t. I didn’t get to see my girl on TV as much as I used to. I would keep glancing for glimpses of her, but the flashes did not come as quickly as I would like. Ten minute ticker, my a$$. So I started to sneak out of the apartment on Sundays. My roommates thought that I was going to press some real flesh.

I would jump into my ’74 Dodge Dart Swinger (green, by the way), drive it to the highest spot that I could find in State College and fire up the Pioneer SuperTuner, just to hopefully steal an auditory flash of her. Through the Jensen speakers, my senses were alive in consummating this secret rendezvous.

Duhe steps in front of the Todd pass and makes his third interception of the championship game!

After college I spent about three years in Atlanta. I figured that greater distance would help in dissolving my lust. As I often am, I was wrong. I ran into her once at the Georgia Dome. That was awkward, but it only confirmed my continued desire to see her as often as I could.

Nagle opens with a bang, but it is only in defeat!

Since, I have had the opportunity to come back to Pennsylvania. A small part of the reason was that I knew I would have opportunity and chance to run into her again. There is nothing more satiating than the chance to re-light the spark. I run into her pretty regularly now. In fact, I tailor many of my weekends around the opportunity to see her. She is still deft at the art of tease, but that only seems to drive me closer to her.

They say that you never truly forget your first true love, and I find that to be true. This girl has been with me for a long time, and I don’t think I will ever be able to give her up.

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